someday's parting, someday's meeting the countless tears and heart throbs pile up I'm still waiting here (so I could, so I would, you know?)
surpassing words, in the depths of my heart it becomes unknown, something is born, a sound plays as if covering it up (so I dream on surely)
forever, from the gap in the stardust when we meet in a dream trembling, to the point my chest hurts the eternal wishes reverberate in time, the bittersweetness is like glass does it reach across (so I could, so I would, you know?)
forever, it reflects the promise I embraced the continuation of the dream, at that time it teased me, leaving far away, gathering light alone I closed my eyes (so I dream on softly)
so I walked without success, just like that day the only thing I looked at was over again my time right now it's fluttering on the windowsill (yes love is softly dancing upward woah yeah)
in the midst of the silence someday's melody the songless words and warmth flow even now it still rings out
surpassing memories, in the depths of loneliness the overlapping tones heal them, the scars on my heart as if resolving sorrow (so I dream on surely)
no matter where, it will connect the radiance when I lift my hands above my head endlessly, it flows into my heart the distant future as well beautifully repeats like ripples of water can you see it (so I could, so I would, you know?)
no matter where, it reflects the promise in the gaps of the dream I embraced them, soundlessly, these emotions drawing a rainbow, light overflowing alone I closed my eyes (so I dream on softly)
and the sky I looked up at alone that day all I sought was a song for me I want to see it, right now I want emotions alone (yes love is softly dancing upward woah yeah)
while nothing but vague things are wandering around the dawn's mazes even if the dream awakes I won't forget
forever, from the gap in the stardust when we meet in a dream trembling, to the point my chest hurts the eternal wishes reverberate in time, the bittersweetness is like glass does it reach across (so I could, so I would, you know?)
forever, it reflects the promise I embraced the continuation of the dream, at that time it teased me, leaving far away, gathering light alone I closed my eyes (so I dream on softly)
so I walked without success, just like that day the only thing I looked at was over again my time right now it's fluttering on the windowsill (yes love is softly dancing upward woah yeah)
I don't know why. But I think things piling up on me, Makes me depressed and anxious. Sometimes, I just feel like bursting out in tears. And this is one of those times.
This feeling isn't comfortable at all. ThankYOU Meda, Vic and Siewps today for bringing me out for lunch, because I felt so stifled so much that I wanted to leave that place immediately. I felt so choked up, maybe because IM BLOODY STRESSED. And the atmosphere is so tense; I didn't enjoy my time in school today. I HATE ROUTINES, AND SCHOOL ROUTINE IS GETTING TO ME ALREADY. ITS LIKE A CIRCLE THAT CYCLES AROUND MY NECK, UNTIL IT BECOMES A HOOP THAT STRANGLES ME, until I choke and gasp for air.
Someth different please? Because we make our lives, I have to make my own too. So don't despair. Like it is, there's only another year left.
Even if I leave, even if I feel like I can't fit into another culture, I still believe that everyth will work out in the end.
THANKYOU, my favourite people who make my day :D bestfriends really are a life-saver. and im glad i have them by my side, always :D thank God.
sometimes i wonder, why will I stand up to make my Life more interesting than it is right now? Because Im so bored everyday, I just want to cry. Jiayou. Just a little more, just a little more. Just another one more year.
After A levels, Im going on an exchange program. Away from here.
Oh wow. Im so stressed over PROMOS, i can't be more stressed, unless it's like A levels. I have fiveeeeeeeee math chapters to go, loads of GEOG chaps and ECONS. Oh and LIT. ERGHH. i can do this.
Andand, I hate feeling sleepy all the time.
And I wish I was taking Japanese to replace GEOG as a H2 subject instead!
Today, that j2 was late again. Cause i saw him so I squealed, right inf ront of elwinchua, so now he's suspicious. LOL. but nvrm. :DDDDD
OMG, YOU KNOW WHAT, I AM SO FURIOUS NOW. THANKS FOR ALL THE BULLSHIT YOU PULLED ON ME, THANKS FOR ALL THE TIMES YOU DIDNT TRUST ME, AND THANKS FOR ALL THE GOODBYE DAYS WHEN YOU SAID YOU WERE MY FRIEND BUT THE TRUTH IS, YOU NEVER WERE. hah, thanks mofo, for proving to me how unworthy you are, of our friendship. And I guess, you will never know, how much I trusted you, before.
And I'd like to tell you that, I don't do nice all the time (: Hope you know it, cause I feel like Im ready to blast at you.
O'MY. WHY ARE THERE ALWAYS PEOPLE WHO IRRITATE AND TALK LIKE IDIOTS, ON THIS EARTH.
I can't get enough of the 2005 One concert at Tokyo Dome! OMGOMGOMG, it is sooo good! I can watch it again and again like forever . It's my incentive to study harder, btw (: So that the holidays will come faster and greater and I can play my eyes out during the Nov & Dec break. Im going for a longgggggggg break from S'pore, thank God.
Cause Im so tired of mugging, but ganbarre!!!!!!!! Don't worry :D Everyth will be fine in the end.
even if i criticise Matsujun all the time, he's still my Matsujun :D My brother so totally did not understand the sentence above..! He was complaining about how Matusjun isnt my BOYFRIEND and i shldnt address him in that way. :/ YEAH I KNOW HE ISNT MY BF, but what i meant was, its like how Arashi is so much a part of my life and Matsujun is my ichiban and all, and no matter whatever stuff he does, mean or not, silly or not (as much as he is), he will always and forever be my ichiban, that's why he's my Matsujun (: Even if I may reallyyyyyy stab at his dance moves sometimes, I still love him. それはAkanishi ジンがかMatsujun の物のようなダンスをなぜするべきでないかである。 ええ! 夢のためのArashi!
THE VIDEO ABOVE IS ANOTHER REASON TO LOVE ARASHI, MORE THAN I ALREADY DO!!!
song title is Subarashi Sekai. :DDDDDDD life is wonderful.
THE RESOLUTION ISNT FANTASTIC, DVD VERSION THAT I HAVE IS BETTER, BUT OMG, WHATS NOT TO LOVE ABOUT ARASHI!?
MatsuJun: " The number one for Arashi will forever, and ever, be you all."
-SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEE!-
Sho's rap kills me; IT IS SOOOOOO GOOD! (((((((((((((; and the moving stage had me going : OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG THAT THING IS SO COOL! and Nino, my Niban!, SUPER CUTE :DDD. Ohno's dance moves were always the sharpest and AHHH! I WANNA WATCH THEM IN CONCERT!
and guess who thought up the moving stage!?? :D MATSUJUN! my matusjun:D
makes mugging all the more worth it, cause im looking forward to my Japan trip, like sooo totally. !!!!
Thank you SO MUCH for telling me that. I really appreciate the kindness you have for condescending yourself to inform me about _____________. Well B*, I dont need that kind of pressure from you. (:
I AM STRESSED. BLAME IT ON MY MESSY FILING BUT YES, I AM STRESSED. I CANNOT FIND MY GEOG NOTES, BUT I DONT NEED THE NOTES TO GET AN A. EVEN SO, I AM PANICKING. maybe because im really tired now, i tend to get cranky. so don't piss me off, thanks. like ahemsoandso above.
DONT WANNA TAKE PROMOS :( but i cant not take them.
can't stand school anymore. maybe the strike will come soon and i will snap, and i will never ever NEVER come back to school again. unlikely, cause i know the As are important.
Dont want to talk about the day's stuff too. But I found my sweater in the library (:
I want to sleep.
Wish you knew how I feel. Not just about you, but about so many other things that I want to tell you. Cause Im still stuck on you.
I lost my sweater in school today!!!!! ITS A DARK BLUE ONE WITH BLACK AND GOLD EMBOIDERED WORDS OVER IT, AND IT'S A SIZE L. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE RETURN IT TO ME IF YOU FOUND IT. I LEFT IT IN THE LIBRARY, ON TOP OF SOMEONE ELSE'S BAG. :(((( damn, im stupid. its probably the second time im wearing that F21 sweater and i promptly lost it. fabulous. GRRR. can the day get any worse?
he burst my bubble but the truth was, you were never like that anyway.
i dined at KFC with pearlyn, abbie, PT, vivian & junjie today, after the council meeting. i feel kind of nauseous after eating those cheese toritas. like URGH. and we gossiped a little to inject some panache into our lives, haha. abbie keep trying to fissure the pimple in his nose; it was totally disgusting but i knew it hurt a lot so i kept trying to tell him to stop it. but right now, im not really cheery-haha so can't think of much cheery-haha stuff to write about. and you know, i gotten new renaissance information recently, from a RELIABLE source. and i am flabbergasted and bewildered by some of these topsecret things that people keep in the deepest darkest recesses of their hearts. you would never have guessed.
today an agency called, and said that i was selected for some job attactment thing for potential manpower in their team, and it was about nanotechnology or someth? i cldnt catch what he said earlier but i heard nanotechnology so it's definitely science. but the weird thing was, he didnt even know where i was studying and what age i was? he said he wanted to CONFIRM some things but he just asked questions, like that is confirming? the poor guy wasn't even pronouncing my name properly. sounds fishy? what's even fishier is that I AM AN ARTS STUDENT. I don't take science. I mean, shouldn't you do background checks on your potential manpower before you actually call to interview them? I am flattered that before I have any job experience or even gone into university, a company has already called to hire me BUT this is too fishy. wayyy too fishy. so I'm not going for the 'interview' tomorrow. LIEK HOW THE HELL DID YOU EVEN GET MY NUMBER? weirded out.
you know, someth is bothering me. and everytime someone tells me someth about you, it just keeps getting worse. like you were never like that, never who you TRIED to be. and this illusion i have of who you were or are or werent or whatever, its getting screwed. really screwed. and i think, that maybe, i dont love you anymore.
i wish you would tell me things, but you chose not to, so that's that. but you can't say, that i didnt try.
because you're so vague and so unnoticed, and so like you wish you'd crawl into a hole and disappear kind of thing, and whereever you are, why do you give off that kind of vibe? maybe that's why i cant get into that head of yours. and i missed you most when you were gone.
you're so. unpredictable. and im so tired of trying, because what's the point anyway?
Hello! Im pretty moody today, yet I had a LOT of fun. Cause I went to town with my beloved councillors! :DDDD
justsoyouknow, not a single drop of those tears were meant for you.
OMG THERE'S SO MANY THINGS TO WRITE ABOUT. AND I DONT KNOW WHERE TO START.
Oh um, I want to tell KWW, that Im really sorry! I know you said you were entertaining me but you really sounded hurt.. UM. Sorry okay, primary school friend? I REALLY DID NOT SAY HELO TO WEIQING ON PURPOSE. I WANTED TO GREET YOU BEFORE HIM. BUT I REALLY THOUGHT YOU DAO-ED ME. :( okay, sorry ya? we should really meet up soon, the whole lot of us. and then maybe i can make it up to you or smth. if you havent guessed, i really feel guilty about it! SIGH. i counted; we have known each other for 8 yrs alrdy.! haha, damn long la. yupp. so well, kinda understand how you felt.
HMMMMMMMMMM. I really missed the 27th. and i really want to thank Pearlyn for comforting me, because I feel really stifled up, these emotions are running over each other; they're strangling me. AND I'VE DECIDED THAT SHE'S SO RIGHT. AND DESPITE ALL THAT I FEEL, THERE'S NO WAY ANYWAY, SO ITS FINE.
but why is it that i cant IGNORE IT? I'm confounded, I'm in a state of consternation, and its only the beginning of every single maelstorm that has painted their picture on the wall of my mind. Inertia is my obstacle, because i can't tear myself away from a polaroid of the green garden. YOUR POLAROID. And I heard all that sadness in her voice, when she called me a Dumb girl, for falling all over rocks and hurting myself despite the warnings.
I saw those warnings; but I chose not to heed them.
I bought a lot of things today. This is my cap for this month's shopping. There's PROMOS too. So that's enough money spending for me. And I have tons of debts to settle too; with my mum too of all people =.= YEH. im getting scared of myself. I think I owe every single one of my friends a little bit of money everywhere. This spurge is freaking me out. THEREFORE, I am going to STOP shopping for the time being.
My phone misplacement was a HUGE SCARE too. The bastards who got my phone deleted all my messages and my contacts from A - E. WTHEHELL. but thanks for returning it anyway.. because if you didnt, I WILL SUFFER FOR ANOTHER 6 MTHS, until the next scheduled phone change.
I CLEARED MY CUPBOARD TODAY. i have 150 ++++ tops. I junked 48 of them away. OMGla. i have to get a new cupboard soon. I feel so damn miserable right now.
IF ONLY I DIDNT HAVE MONEY WOES. :( but damn, this reminds me that im still a student. a poor student at that.
im getting paranoid. i really need to calm down.
sometimes, my naivete irritates me. but grrr.. im trying.
I LOST MY PHONE YESTERDAY!! BUT SOMEONE FOUND IT AND CALLED MY HOUSE!! OMGOMGTHANKYOUSOMUCH!!!!!~ MUCHLOVE! There is a God up there.
ANYWAYS, I MISSED THE 27TH SO MCUH!!!!! I realised HOW MUCH when I saw Abdillah yesterday. I SCREAMED. I LITERALLY SCREAMED.! I miss his bitch-ness so much! And the stories.. were great. 'Cept for some . AND TIEWCHINGWEI! AND JEAN! :DDDDDDDDDDDDD Haven't seen much of the others yetttttt so haven't screamed that much, hahahas. because i was bloody hell trying to look for my phone so i was late....
OMG. I SHOULD BE IN SCHOOL NOW. WTH AM I DOING AT HOME?
grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. stop procrasinating!!!
because i missed you so. and i would stop lying to myself, the extent of the "miss yous" i've stored in my phone, is proof enough that your absence was not nothing to me.
OMGGGGG. i love my KAZUNARI NINOMIYA sooooo much! because he's so unbelievably ADORABLEEE! ahhh!~! Nino is wearing tapered jeans! haha! and the scene with him in a conductor's suit cracked me up so much! so much LOVE! ~ :DDDDDDDD I LOVE ARASHI~~~~~~~~~~~! and I want to watch their concert in JAPAN. so please, let someone send me there. pretty please?? :D
There's so much stuff I want to do in life, it feels as if there isnt enough time right now to DO IT ALL!!! I want to write books, tons and tons of them, I want to do magazine editorials, I want to do interviews with mega stars! I want to be a music producer! I so want to study Japanese properly and French as well! I want to go to CAMBRIDGEEEEE~~~~~~~
I WANT TO EXCEL. I WANT TO BE ANYTH BUT ORDINARY, BECAUSE ORDINARY IS SO BLAHH.
I WANT TO SCREAM AT THE OCEAN, AND TELL IT TO TAKE ME TO ITS DEEPEST DEPTHS. Oh, and i want to do scuba-diving. I want to drive. I want to bungee-jump. I want to lead a life that's SO NOT BORING.
IM GOING TO PROSPER. IM GOING TO LOVE GOD WITH ALL MY MIGHT, AND IM GOING TO FIND THAT MR SOMEONE, ONE DAY.
I don't understand how some people can say that Life is meaningless. LIFE HAS MEANING; YOU JUST HAVE TO LOOK FOR IT.
AND THOSE PAPERBACKS MEAN NOTHING; BECAUSE BORING FACTS ARE DUST AGAINST THE JOYRIDE OF LIFE.
I went back to JVS for Teachers' Day. Talked to a lot of my ex-teachers, haha (: I promised my english teacher that I'd return to visit when I get my 4 As for A levels! :DDDDDDDDDD Yes, I will. Saw LOADS of my ex-classmates ! Appearances have changed, haha . WL's hair is going from bad to blahhh. LOL. I told him, haha. Louisa and YX enjoyed showing off their card 'magic'. Eevin and I screamed at each other, LOL! I screamed when I saw Joanne & Andrea, out of joy. Lau! Seems like AGES since I've seen JO and DREA laaaaaaahhhhh. They were blaming me for never coming to Fri meet-ups! -pouts- Sorry man, FRI always happens to have stuff :( And KaiNing, YewLeong, the whole bunch of 4B/4C guys, TANHUIYING!!!!! (OMG, I havent seen her in 8 mths laaaa!!!! I cant believe it!), YanLing, XingYi and moreeeeee. Some I didnt recognise at sight, others I cldnt rmbr their names, BEH. IM SORRY I FORGOT YOUR NAMES :(
2 weeks ago, a guy said hello to me on the bus, and i said hello back too. he looked familiar... when i got off, i was like "who was that?" the whole incident affected me so much cos i really cldnt rmb who he was.. but i said hello cos he was being so friendly. argh. apologies to the nice ex-classmate who said helo to me!but i cldnt rmb who you are :( im so sorry. maybe one day your name will appear in my mind (:
I miss those old days, where nothing seemed to matter, where the future was still waiting for us. Where green was my uniform colour. IM PROUD OF WHERE I WAS AND I STILL AM.. because I emerged from JVS, a better person.
I HAVE DECIDED. I WANT TO STUDY IN AN OVERSEAS UNIVERSITY. I WANT TO SEE THE WORLD. I WANT TO LIVE MY DREAM. THEREFORE, FROM THIS MOMENT ONWARDS, NOTHING IS GOING TO STOP ME FROM GIVING MY ALL, TO ACADEMICS AND EVERYTH ELSE. I AM GOING TO GET A SCHOLARSHIP, BECAUSE I KNOW I CAN DO IT!
(If I had a choice on how my life will be, I want to travel with someone I love,
and take photographs of the myriad and the pretty, spreading the love of Christ,
near and far until the ends of the world!)
I ♥ God and God ♥ me!
Contrary to popular belief, I'm not unfriendly!!!!!!
Talk to me and I'd definitely talk to you.
Most people don't really get me but I usually get most people.
Economics is beyond fascinating. ;)
x
Family is ♥!
Best friends are ♥!
Colours are ♥!
The universe is ♥!
Layout: Lost Days Best viewed: Internet Explorer Resolution: 1024X768 Credits: IIIIVVVI
26 September 2007
Ohno's solo ;
Song For Me : Ohno Satoshi Arashi album: Time
someday's parting, someday's meeting the countless tears and heart throbs pile up I'm still waiting here (so I could, so I would, you know?)
surpassing words, in the depths of my heart it becomes unknown, something is born, a sound plays as if covering it up (so I dream on surely)
forever, from the gap in the stardust when we meet in a dream trembling, to the point my chest hurts the eternal wishes reverberate in time, the bittersweetness is like glass does it reach across (so I could, so I would, you know?)
forever, it reflects the promise I embraced the continuation of the dream, at that time it teased me, leaving far away, gathering light alone I closed my eyes (so I dream on softly)
so I walked without success, just like that day the only thing I looked at was over again my time right now it's fluttering on the windowsill (yes love is softly dancing upward woah yeah)
in the midst of the silence someday's melody the songless words and warmth flow even now it still rings out
surpassing memories, in the depths of loneliness the overlapping tones heal them, the scars on my heart as if resolving sorrow (so I dream on surely)
no matter where, it will connect the radiance when I lift my hands above my head endlessly, it flows into my heart the distant future as well beautifully repeats like ripples of water can you see it (so I could, so I would, you know?)
no matter where, it reflects the promise in the gaps of the dream I embraced them, soundlessly, these emotions drawing a rainbow, light overflowing alone I closed my eyes (so I dream on softly)
and the sky I looked up at alone that day all I sought was a song for me I want to see it, right now I want emotions alone (yes love is softly dancing upward woah yeah)
while nothing but vague things are wandering around the dawn's mazes even if the dream awakes I won't forget
forever, from the gap in the stardust when we meet in a dream trembling, to the point my chest hurts the eternal wishes reverberate in time, the bittersweetness is like glass does it reach across (so I could, so I would, you know?)
forever, it reflects the promise I embraced the continuation of the dream, at that time it teased me, leaving far away, gathering light alone I closed my eyes (so I dream on softly)
so I walked without success, just like that day the only thing I looked at was over again my time right now it's fluttering on the windowsill (yes love is softly dancing upward woah yeah)
I don't know why. But I think things piling up on me, Makes me depressed and anxious. Sometimes, I just feel like bursting out in tears. And this is one of those times.
This feeling isn't comfortable at all. ThankYOU Meda, Vic and Siewps today for bringing me out for lunch, because I felt so stifled so much that I wanted to leave that place immediately. I felt so choked up, maybe because IM BLOODY STRESSED. And the atmosphere is so tense; I didn't enjoy my time in school today. I HATE ROUTINES, AND SCHOOL ROUTINE IS GETTING TO ME ALREADY. ITS LIKE A CIRCLE THAT CYCLES AROUND MY NECK, UNTIL IT BECOMES A HOOP THAT STRANGLES ME, until I choke and gasp for air.
Someth different please? Because we make our lives, I have to make my own too. So don't despair. Like it is, there's only another year left.
Even if I leave, even if I feel like I can't fit into another culture, I still believe that everyth will work out in the end.
THANKYOU, my favourite people who make my day :D bestfriends really are a life-saver. and im glad i have them by my side, always :D thank God.
sometimes i wonder, why will I stand up to make my Life more interesting than it is right now? Because Im so bored everyday, I just want to cry. Jiayou. Just a little more, just a little more. Just another one more year.
After A levels, Im going on an exchange program. Away from here.
Oh wow. Im so stressed over PROMOS, i can't be more stressed, unless it's like A levels. I have fiveeeeeeeee math chapters to go, loads of GEOG chaps and ECONS. Oh and LIT. ERGHH. i can do this.
Andand, I hate feeling sleepy all the time.
And I wish I was taking Japanese to replace GEOG as a H2 subject instead!
Today, that j2 was late again. Cause i saw him so I squealed, right inf ront of elwinchua, so now he's suspicious. LOL. but nvrm. :DDDDD
OMG, YOU KNOW WHAT, I AM SO FURIOUS NOW. THANKS FOR ALL THE BULLSHIT YOU PULLED ON ME, THANKS FOR ALL THE TIMES YOU DIDNT TRUST ME, AND THANKS FOR ALL THE GOODBYE DAYS WHEN YOU SAID YOU WERE MY FRIEND BUT THE TRUTH IS, YOU NEVER WERE. hah, thanks mofo, for proving to me how unworthy you are, of our friendship. And I guess, you will never know, how much I trusted you, before.
And I'd like to tell you that, I don't do nice all the time (: Hope you know it, cause I feel like Im ready to blast at you.
O'MY. WHY ARE THERE ALWAYS PEOPLE WHO IRRITATE AND TALK LIKE IDIOTS, ON THIS EARTH.
I can't get enough of the 2005 One concert at Tokyo Dome! OMGOMGOMG, it is sooo good! I can watch it again and again like forever . It's my incentive to study harder, btw (: So that the holidays will come faster and greater and I can play my eyes out during the Nov & Dec break. Im going for a longgggggggg break from S'pore, thank God.
Cause Im so tired of mugging, but ganbarre!!!!!!!! Don't worry :D Everyth will be fine in the end.
even if i criticise Matsujun all the time, he's still my Matsujun :D My brother so totally did not understand the sentence above..! He was complaining about how Matusjun isnt my BOYFRIEND and i shldnt address him in that way. :/ YEAH I KNOW HE ISNT MY BF, but what i meant was, its like how Arashi is so much a part of my life and Matsujun is my ichiban and all, and no matter whatever stuff he does, mean or not, silly or not (as much as he is), he will always and forever be my ichiban, that's why he's my Matsujun (: Even if I may reallyyyyyy stab at his dance moves sometimes, I still love him. それはAkanishi ジンがかMatsujun の物のようなダンスをなぜするべきでないかである。 ええ! 夢のためのArashi!
THE VIDEO ABOVE IS ANOTHER REASON TO LOVE ARASHI, MORE THAN I ALREADY DO!!!
song title is Subarashi Sekai. :DDDDDDD life is wonderful.
THE RESOLUTION ISNT FANTASTIC, DVD VERSION THAT I HAVE IS BETTER, BUT OMG, WHATS NOT TO LOVE ABOUT ARASHI!?
MatsuJun: " The number one for Arashi will forever, and ever, be you all."
-SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEE!-
Sho's rap kills me; IT IS SOOOOOO GOOD! (((((((((((((; and the moving stage had me going : OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG THAT THING IS SO COOL! and Nino, my Niban!, SUPER CUTE :DDD. Ohno's dance moves were always the sharpest and AHHH! I WANNA WATCH THEM IN CONCERT!
and guess who thought up the moving stage!?? :D MATSUJUN! my matusjun:D
makes mugging all the more worth it, cause im looking forward to my Japan trip, like sooo totally. !!!!
Thank you SO MUCH for telling me that. I really appreciate the kindness you have for condescending yourself to inform me about _____________. Well B*, I dont need that kind of pressure from you. (:
I AM STRESSED. BLAME IT ON MY MESSY FILING BUT YES, I AM STRESSED. I CANNOT FIND MY GEOG NOTES, BUT I DONT NEED THE NOTES TO GET AN A. EVEN SO, I AM PANICKING. maybe because im really tired now, i tend to get cranky. so don't piss me off, thanks. like ahemsoandso above.
DONT WANNA TAKE PROMOS :( but i cant not take them.
can't stand school anymore. maybe the strike will come soon and i will snap, and i will never ever NEVER come back to school again. unlikely, cause i know the As are important.
Dont want to talk about the day's stuff too. But I found my sweater in the library (:
I want to sleep.
Wish you knew how I feel. Not just about you, but about so many other things that I want to tell you. Cause Im still stuck on you.
I lost my sweater in school today!!!!! ITS A DARK BLUE ONE WITH BLACK AND GOLD EMBOIDERED WORDS OVER IT, AND IT'S A SIZE L. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE RETURN IT TO ME IF YOU FOUND IT. I LEFT IT IN THE LIBRARY, ON TOP OF SOMEONE ELSE'S BAG. :(((( damn, im stupid. its probably the second time im wearing that F21 sweater and i promptly lost it. fabulous. GRRR. can the day get any worse?
he burst my bubble but the truth was, you were never like that anyway.
i dined at KFC with pearlyn, abbie, PT, vivian & junjie today, after the council meeting. i feel kind of nauseous after eating those cheese toritas. like URGH. and we gossiped a little to inject some panache into our lives, haha. abbie keep trying to fissure the pimple in his nose; it was totally disgusting but i knew it hurt a lot so i kept trying to tell him to stop it. but right now, im not really cheery-haha so can't think of much cheery-haha stuff to write about. and you know, i gotten new renaissance information recently, from a RELIABLE source. and i am flabbergasted and bewildered by some of these topsecret things that people keep in the deepest darkest recesses of their hearts. you would never have guessed.
today an agency called, and said that i was selected for some job attactment thing for potential manpower in their team, and it was about nanotechnology or someth? i cldnt catch what he said earlier but i heard nanotechnology so it's definitely science. but the weird thing was, he didnt even know where i was studying and what age i was? he said he wanted to CONFIRM some things but he just asked questions, like that is confirming? the poor guy wasn't even pronouncing my name properly. sounds fishy? what's even fishier is that I AM AN ARTS STUDENT. I don't take science. I mean, shouldn't you do background checks on your potential manpower before you actually call to interview them? I am flattered that before I have any job experience or even gone into university, a company has already called to hire me BUT this is too fishy. wayyy too fishy. so I'm not going for the 'interview' tomorrow. LIEK HOW THE HELL DID YOU EVEN GET MY NUMBER? weirded out.
you know, someth is bothering me. and everytime someone tells me someth about you, it just keeps getting worse. like you were never like that, never who you TRIED to be. and this illusion i have of who you were or are or werent or whatever, its getting screwed. really screwed. and i think, that maybe, i dont love you anymore.
i wish you would tell me things, but you chose not to, so that's that. but you can't say, that i didnt try.
because you're so vague and so unnoticed, and so like you wish you'd crawl into a hole and disappear kind of thing, and whereever you are, why do you give off that kind of vibe? maybe that's why i cant get into that head of yours. and i missed you most when you were gone.
you're so. unpredictable. and im so tired of trying, because what's the point anyway?
Hello! Im pretty moody today, yet I had a LOT of fun. Cause I went to town with my beloved councillors! :DDDD
justsoyouknow, not a single drop of those tears were meant for you.
OMG THERE'S SO MANY THINGS TO WRITE ABOUT. AND I DONT KNOW WHERE TO START.
Oh um, I want to tell KWW, that Im really sorry! I know you said you were entertaining me but you really sounded hurt.. UM. Sorry okay, primary school friend? I REALLY DID NOT SAY HELO TO WEIQING ON PURPOSE. I WANTED TO GREET YOU BEFORE HIM. BUT I REALLY THOUGHT YOU DAO-ED ME. :( okay, sorry ya? we should really meet up soon, the whole lot of us. and then maybe i can make it up to you or smth. if you havent guessed, i really feel guilty about it! SIGH. i counted; we have known each other for 8 yrs alrdy.! haha, damn long la. yupp. so well, kinda understand how you felt.
HMMMMMMMMMM. I really missed the 27th. and i really want to thank Pearlyn for comforting me, because I feel really stifled up, these emotions are running over each other; they're strangling me. AND I'VE DECIDED THAT SHE'S SO RIGHT. AND DESPITE ALL THAT I FEEL, THERE'S NO WAY ANYWAY, SO ITS FINE.
but why is it that i cant IGNORE IT? I'm confounded, I'm in a state of consternation, and its only the beginning of every single maelstorm that has painted their picture on the wall of my mind. Inertia is my obstacle, because i can't tear myself away from a polaroid of the green garden. YOUR POLAROID. And I heard all that sadness in her voice, when she called me a Dumb girl, for falling all over rocks and hurting myself despite the warnings.
I saw those warnings; but I chose not to heed them.
I bought a lot of things today. This is my cap for this month's shopping. There's PROMOS too. So that's enough money spending for me. And I have tons of debts to settle too; with my mum too of all people =.= YEH. im getting scared of myself. I think I owe every single one of my friends a little bit of money everywhere. This spurge is freaking me out. THEREFORE, I am going to STOP shopping for the time being.
My phone misplacement was a HUGE SCARE too. The bastards who got my phone deleted all my messages and my contacts from A - E. WTHEHELL. but thanks for returning it anyway.. because if you didnt, I WILL SUFFER FOR ANOTHER 6 MTHS, until the next scheduled phone change.
I CLEARED MY CUPBOARD TODAY. i have 150 ++++ tops. I junked 48 of them away. OMGla. i have to get a new cupboard soon. I feel so damn miserable right now.
IF ONLY I DIDNT HAVE MONEY WOES. :( but damn, this reminds me that im still a student. a poor student at that.
im getting paranoid. i really need to calm down.
sometimes, my naivete irritates me. but grrr.. im trying.
I LOST MY PHONE YESTERDAY!! BUT SOMEONE FOUND IT AND CALLED MY HOUSE!! OMGOMGTHANKYOUSOMUCH!!!!!~ MUCHLOVE! There is a God up there.
ANYWAYS, I MISSED THE 27TH SO MCUH!!!!! I realised HOW MUCH when I saw Abdillah yesterday. I SCREAMED. I LITERALLY SCREAMED.! I miss his bitch-ness so much! And the stories.. were great. 'Cept for some . AND TIEWCHINGWEI! AND JEAN! :DDDDDDDDDDDDD Haven't seen much of the others yetttttt so haven't screamed that much, hahahas. because i was bloody hell trying to look for my phone so i was late....
OMG. I SHOULD BE IN SCHOOL NOW. WTH AM I DOING AT HOME?
grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. stop procrasinating!!!
because i missed you so. and i would stop lying to myself, the extent of the "miss yous" i've stored in my phone, is proof enough that your absence was not nothing to me.
OMGGGGG. i love my KAZUNARI NINOMIYA sooooo much! because he's so unbelievably ADORABLEEE! ahhh!~! Nino is wearing tapered jeans! haha! and the scene with him in a conductor's suit cracked me up so much! so much LOVE! ~ :DDDDDDDD I LOVE ARASHI~~~~~~~~~~~! and I want to watch their concert in JAPAN. so please, let someone send me there. pretty please?? :D
There's so much stuff I want to do in life, it feels as if there isnt enough time right now to DO IT ALL!!! I want to write books, tons and tons of them, I want to do magazine editorials, I want to do interviews with mega stars! I want to be a music producer! I so want to study Japanese properly and French as well! I want to go to CAMBRIDGEEEEE~~~~~~~
I WANT TO EXCEL. I WANT TO BE ANYTH BUT ORDINARY, BECAUSE ORDINARY IS SO BLAHH.
I WANT TO SCREAM AT THE OCEAN, AND TELL IT TO TAKE ME TO ITS DEEPEST DEPTHS. Oh, and i want to do scuba-diving. I want to drive. I want to bungee-jump. I want to lead a life that's SO NOT BORING.
IM GOING TO PROSPER. IM GOING TO LOVE GOD WITH ALL MY MIGHT, AND IM GOING TO FIND THAT MR SOMEONE, ONE DAY.
I don't understand how some people can say that Life is meaningless. LIFE HAS MEANING; YOU JUST HAVE TO LOOK FOR IT.
AND THOSE PAPERBACKS MEAN NOTHING; BECAUSE BORING FACTS ARE DUST AGAINST THE JOYRIDE OF LIFE.
I went back to JVS for Teachers' Day. Talked to a lot of my ex-teachers, haha (: I promised my english teacher that I'd return to visit when I get my 4 As for A levels! :DDDDDDDDDD Yes, I will. Saw LOADS of my ex-classmates ! Appearances have changed, haha . WL's hair is going from bad to blahhh. LOL. I told him, haha. Louisa and YX enjoyed showing off their card 'magic'. Eevin and I screamed at each other, LOL! I screamed when I saw Joanne & Andrea, out of joy. Lau! Seems like AGES since I've seen JO and DREA laaaaaaahhhhh. They were blaming me for never coming to Fri meet-ups! -pouts- Sorry man, FRI always happens to have stuff :( And KaiNing, YewLeong, the whole bunch of 4B/4C guys, TANHUIYING!!!!! (OMG, I havent seen her in 8 mths laaaa!!!! I cant believe it!), YanLing, XingYi and moreeeeee. Some I didnt recognise at sight, others I cldnt rmbr their names, BEH. IM SORRY I FORGOT YOUR NAMES :(
2 weeks ago, a guy said hello to me on the bus, and i said hello back too. he looked familiar... when i got off, i was like "who was that?" the whole incident affected me so much cos i really cldnt rmb who he was.. but i said hello cos he was being so friendly. argh. apologies to the nice ex-classmate who said helo to me!but i cldnt rmb who you are :( im so sorry. maybe one day your name will appear in my mind (:
I miss those old days, where nothing seemed to matter, where the future was still waiting for us. Where green was my uniform colour. IM PROUD OF WHERE I WAS AND I STILL AM.. because I emerged from JVS, a better person.
I HAVE DECIDED. I WANT TO STUDY IN AN OVERSEAS UNIVERSITY. I WANT TO SEE THE WORLD. I WANT TO LIVE MY DREAM. THEREFORE, FROM THIS MOMENT ONWARDS, NOTHING IS GOING TO STOP ME FROM GIVING MY ALL, TO ACADEMICS AND EVERYTH ELSE. I AM GOING TO GET A SCHOLARSHIP, BECAUSE I KNOW I CAN DO IT!
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