Benazir Bhutto got assasinated...!!!! I haven't read the papers for exactly four days. In four days, things sure happened. I feel sad. Musharraf is going to rule Pakistan forever. She was a beacon of hope for many.. Even though Pakistan isn't my country, I share in the grief that many feel. Was it a conspiracy by the military government? It's unlikely that it was ordered personally by Musharraf himself, I see him as a man, dictator nonetheless, but a man that keeps his promises. She was indeed a threat to him; so perhaps his colleagues had a part to play in the assasination. Pakistan has been thrown into a state of chaos. Justice must be carried out and quickly! Will the January parliamentary elections still be carried out? With Bhutto dead, it's almost meaningless now. But to honour her memory, it is hoped that Pakistan will continue with the election.
By the way, "Bhutto's aides said they doubted militant commander Baitullah Mehsud was behind the attack on the opposition leader and said the government's claim that she died when she hit her head on the sunroof of her vehicle was "dangerous nonsense." " NONSENSE INDEED.
Well. There's a test on monday for councillors and OGLs. Study hard everyone! Including me (:
HELLO! I'M BACK FROM OGL CAMP:D and still dead tired even through I had 9 hours of sleep earlier. I just closed my eyes, it was about 1 pm and when I awoke, the sky was already dark. It was quite a shock really.
OGL Camp was really fun, although I was pretty much out of it on this morning because of lack of sleep. Uh, I loved song-singing:DDD I really admire people who can still function despite not sleeping. Like Huilan. I mean, girl, how do you manage to study all night and sleep for an hour only to get up again to come to school for examinations? I've never been able to do it. I got Dad to take me home because I didn't think I had the strength to get up on a bus. Hm, usually I'm not this bummed after a 3 day camp but then again, usually we have more sleep. But hey, it was kinda fun trying to get up really early and running around because usually I don't wake up before 10 if I can help it.
I was really cranky though and I yelled at my brother for being not locking the door after me although he reallyy didn't deserve it. Mum was really nice despite commenting that I looked like a zombie. She made my favourite food for lunch and she even made Mum's Special Soup which is really complicated to do. Really touched. Thanks Mum. Right there and then, I really really really appreciated home-cooked food and my mum and my dad and my bed and my maid. I was so grateful until I almost cried. But before I could do that, I fell asleep on the bed, of course. LOVES.
Sometimes, I don't think horoscopes are just a kind of labelling. I feel that it's pretty damn true. I'm a Libra and they always say Libras can't make up their minds. True. I'm pretty fickle-minded. They also say that they're gullible. Crap, so true. And a lot more.
Oh, I wish I wish I stayed. Can no one understand. I can't turn the clock back. I can't bring back the past. So make do with the future.
I couldn't call through to UK today. I don't know why. I wanted to tell Aunty Taisee and Charlotte and the others Merry Christmas. But Uncle Ray got through to us, so I don't know why we couldn't call through. I wish I had more to say to Uncle Ray. Why do I feel like things changed.
My very very very nice kor (See? I said you're nice) keep trying to see his xiao mei more often but I always can't make it. ARGH. Sorry lah. Today's countdown, counting down elsewhere lols. New year's okay?
The usual day entry.
Ah! Today I received Aunty Liz's Christmas card from UK. Veh happy :D
Listen, I'm officially in love with Elijah Wood's superb acting. Yeah, I watched Lord of the Rings again. Can you imagine that he's not Frodo? It's impossible.
I told _____ that I didn't want ______, not even 10 meters near _______. What, am I on an excessive compulsive streak again? Not that I have ever been. Sigh. Ireadsomethingtodaythatmademyheadburstthoughitwasquiteawhileagoanditsanxstupid. Sometimes, I feel like drawing a huge Los Noches. Just to spite Mei. Not.
if only hearts were unbreakable.
Silent Night as sung in church.
Silent night, holy night All is calm, all is bright Round yon Virgin Mother and Child Holy Infant so tender and mild Sleep in heavenly peace Sleep in heavenly peace
Silent night, holy night! Shepherds quake at the sight Glories stream from heaven afar Heavenly hosts sing Alleluia! Christ, the Saviour is born Christ, the Saviour is born
Silent night, holy night Son of God, love's pure light Radiant beams from Thy holy face With the dawn of redeeming grace Jesus, Lord, at Thy birth Jesus, Lord, at Thy birth.
John 3:16
For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.
Seriously. My butt hurts, my shoulders ache and my head spins. Woo. And I'm sun burnt so badly, my arm all the way to the back of my hand is like bright red, not to mention my thighs and my legs and my feet. greaaattt~ Way to go, Cherie. Yay. Ouch. (I hit my elbow on the side of the table....) My sweet sister helped me apply aloe vera cream on it... Aw, so sweet. I'd get diabeties. Haha, just joking.. But it was really nice of her.
Besides, having a lot of havoc. There was also brainstorming. And answering tons of messages. How sweet. And reading some stuff. Top secret. Shh. And wondering if stoning just so I can have some kind of inspiration is actually going to help me study. I came to the conclusion that it isn't. Duh.
超级星光大道的林宥嘉ROCKS! He got above 20 stars for his performance again. Go, my Taiwanese Nino! :DDDDD
Time magazine rocks the sun. The List of Top 10 best quotes of the year just makes me laugh my eyes out. "Won't you just shut up?" anyone? Said by some King. Yours Truly, by royalty.
It's that feeling again. The feeling that someone was talking to me about just now. About looking at your best friend and wondering, "Who in the world is this person?" I even told another friend during our lengthy conversation that you're my almost ex-best friend. What happened? Am I going crazy? I would never have dreamed of saying that two years ago. But come on, I asked you if everything is alright, you said you'd talk to me soon. How soon is soon. How soon is soon. How soon is never. What's wrong? We tried didn't we. Sometimes, it's you who's making me feel like I've been abandoned. Just sometimes, it's the best friends who can make you feel like shit. And then, you realise, I've been the one hanging on.
Libra: Your desire to move on may be less than it once was. Lately, you have been made aware of the true cost of your plans, but at the heart of the matter you probably doubt whether you are truly worth it. Please put aside your lack of self-confidence once and for all.
Too bloody true.
Sometimes, I feel like I fight against nothing but fear.
okay, whatever.
MY EXTREMELY ANNOYING KID BROTHER CAME BEHIND ME JUST NOW AND BOO-ED ME WHEN I WAS THINKING ABOUT SOMETHING THAT IS DAMNHELL PERPLEXING AND I LOST MY TRAIN OF THOUGHT AND IN A MOMENT OF VIOLENCE, I THREW MY GOOD PEN AT HIM, WHAT THE HELL. STUPID KID, IT WASN'T SCARY BUT ANNOYING! I JUST WISH HE WOULD FUCKING GROW UP AND STOP BEING SUCH A BRAT AND READ THE SITUATION, DAMN IT. SOMETIMES LIKE NOW, I JUST WANT TO WRING HIS STUPID FAT WHITE NECK AND KILL HIM AND GET OVER WITH IT, JUST FOR THE SAKE OF NOT LIVING WITH THE PAIN OF HAVING TO COACH HIM ALL THE BLOODY TIME AND NOT GETTING ANY STUPID CREDIT AND STILL HAVING TO GIVE HIM OH, HE'S A KID TREATMENT WHEN I GET FURIOUS OVER HIM, SO I CAN'T TOUCH ONE SINGLE HAIR OF HIS BLOODY SHIN BECAUSE OLDER SISTERS ARE SUPPOSED TO PROTECT THEIR YOUNGER BROTHERS. EAT DIRT IN HELL CAUSE IM NOT DOING IT ANY LONGER. I'VE TOLERATED ENOUGH.
DAMN IT. AND IM NOT GOING BACK TO THINKING ABOUT THAT STUPID THING I WAS FRUSTRATED OVER. NOT IF PEOPLE ARE GOING TO INTERRUPT ME, NO FING WAY IN HELL.
This is me being extremely extremely angry beyond boiling point! Unpleasantness comes with siblings.
And to think that a while ago I was actually doing alright and now, he's turned that half smile into a full blown frown.
Cherie ( what makes sense : 朴素的世界。 says: you din reply my msg idiot. [c=4]Moni [/c] says: wat [c=4]Moni [/c] says: i slping lah Cherie ( what makes sense : 朴素的世界。 says: wah lau
You have just sent a nudge.
Cherie ( what makes sense : 朴素的世界。 says: dont tell me you're still slping LUH. [c=4]Moni [/c] says: wat [c=4]Moni [/c] says: not gd for me lor Cherie ( what makes sense : 朴素的世界。 says: whyyy? [c=4]Moni [/c] says: i c the assignments i sian diao [c=4]Moni [/c] says: -angry face- Cherie ( what makes sense : 朴素的世界。 says: your face is always angry Cherie ( what makes sense : 朴素的世界。 says: LOL Cherie ( what makes sense : 朴素的世界。 says: sadded -SECRET-
Cherie ( what makes sense : 朴素的世界。 says: look at nick/ Cherie ( what makes sense : 朴素的世界。 says: haha [c=4]Moni [/c] says: chung!!! [c=4]Moni [/c] says: NOT CHONG Cherie ( what makes sense : 朴素的世界。 says: OOPS. [c=4]Moni [/c] says: alamak [c=4]Moni [/c] says: 5 yrs fren le [c=4]Moni [/c] says: change [c=4]Moni [/c] says: WTH??!! Cherie ( what makes sense : 朴素的世界。 says: i keep forgetting Cherie ( what makes sense : 朴素的世界。 says: HAHAHAHAH [c=4]Moni [/c] says: eh [c=4]Moni [/c] says: y chong again [c=4]Moni [/c] says: omg [c=4]Moni [/c] says: chung [c=4]Moni [/c] says: chung [c=4]Moni [/c] says: CHUNG [c=4]Moni [/c] says: no slash [c=4]Moni [/c] says: no / [c=4]Moni [/c] says: LOL [c=4]Moni [/c] says: yes Cherie ( what makes sense : 朴素的世界。 says: LOL [c=4]Moni [/c] says: tats right [c=4]Moni [/c] says: c my nick [c=4]Moni [/c] says: wat?!! [c=4]Moni [/c] says: chuga? [c=4]Moni [/c] says: oO [c=4]Moni [/c] says: :2 Cherie ( ow : my time magazine has arrived (: says: HAHAHA Cherie ( ow : my time magazine has arrived (: says: READ Cherie ( ow : my time magazine has arrived (: says: lol [c=4]Moni [/c] says: OK [c=4]Moni [/c] says: c [c=4]Moni [/c] says: unqiue right? [c=4]Moni [/c] says: im not toking abt u Cherie ( ow : my time magazine has arrived (: says: SHARING LIAN??? Cherie ( ow : my time magazine has arrived (: says: WAD DOES TT MEAN? [c=4]Moni [/c] says: LOL [c=4]Moni [/c] says: cherie mah [c=4]Moni [/c] says: den change to sharing Cherie ( ow : my time magazine has arrived (: says: HAHA Cherie ( ow : my time magazine has arrived (: says: chuga chuga Cherie ( ow : my time magazine has arrived (: says: LOL
you can't beat best friends for life man. you just can't.
Liw, my dearest twin sister though fortune that you share the same first name as me, I want to tell you that you're never alone. Sometimes, you may look around and feel alone but I hope you remember that we're just one call away, you know? Even if I'm like in some important lecture, or overseas or running around, so long as my phone rings, with your names, I will stop everything and listen. That's how much all of you mean to me, no, I should say that it can never be weighed, the importance of you 6. Just like how, when I broke down in school without the company of everyone and I called HuiQing in tears, I know that if I called anyone else in 7seven, you too would have stopped everything for me and listened to me sob. Jiayou! Gambatte! Fight on! You can do it! I say! Don't give up! Waves 12 is going to be great! And soon after, you can properly study alright? :D I had a great time talking about the past and present today! We should do stuff like these more often lah! But most importantly, I want you to remember not to overwork yourself!!!! OR you'd get it from me. HAHA. Kidding ~~~~~~ Much love.
I went to grandma's place, as usual. Mark korkor is back from Australia. I'm always happy to see family members who live overseas and are back for a while (:
I mean, I havent seen Mark kor for about 2 years now. He didn't change much.. But his hair is really tame now! It used to be crazyyyyy man, like mohawks and blue dyes and who knows what. He took out a few piercings I think.. It's just the lip piercing now. And he speaks with an aussie twang now. The stuff he tells me about Aus, man, I've always hated the racism there. Yesyes, I learnt plenty of words of wisdom from my wild cousin who has grown up alot.
My dad got threatened when he was there just because he's Asian. That's like, WTF, #$*(^&#^*t*fSTFU. Racism is disgusting. Isn't he human just like the rest of you? Shant say much, but yeah, but we were pissed, thanks. And apparently, their customs went through my aunt's wallet while she was there, asking her why she didnt bring much Aussie dollars and about her credit cards and her job and GOD KNOWS WHAT ELSE. WTF MAN, THAT'S LIKE AN INVASION OF PERSONAL PRIVACY. Oh right, I forgot, she's chinese too.
I've met nice Australians, I'm not saying they aren't nice. It's just bad experiences, maybe.
I had fun at grandma's place. I love her curry and her chicken wings and her presence. I heard someone call me 大小姐 today.. It usually happens when I'm being slow or whiny or something. It came about because I'm the oldest paternal granddaughter.. But I grinned when I heard it. Cause it's just so funny. Somehow, instead of feeling important, I felt like I'm being reprimanded in an amusing way.
I'm ready to roll. I've collected the pieces of me that scattered, I found back my dreams, those that I lost sight of while struggling in the dark cloth of sorrow. No more looking back.
Isn't it weird how some people you put all your trust upon ends up disappointing you? Isn't it incredible how one finds themselves in a situation they never thought they'd end in; turning left and right and finding yourself alone. Accidentally clicking on somebody's blog link and realised that you've been hurt by edgeless words, even as hard as you try to keep your heart still. Calling up that someone and wondering if they'd still pick up the call. Wondering.. wondering. Not knowing who is going to call and say "Come on, we need to talk" or "I missed you, how have you been?" How wretched is reality. How different as Time flows. Wondering if that friend who still claims to be your friend would listen to you, would talk, would understand, would they even care? Not knowing who is left, isn't that just so bitter. Sometimes I reflect and I remember, endless promises of friendship and fellowship and what nots and understand, at last, that forever is nothing. 10 yrs from now, would you still remember me? You friend, you who shared and laughed and cried and smiled. Would you remember? Tell me, would you?
im damn bummed lah. just got back from breakaway camp. the coolest camp ever can.
here we go again.
想要说，但还是沉默。。。
oh yeah, i left the camp early cause of family obligations.. From my CG, there are Hema, Xue Ting, Xue Yi and Yu Xian. And my team's name is called Paladin 1! :D We're the blues. Hahaha. Made a lot of new friends.. Surprisingly, I could rem all of their names with just one mention, my superb memory shows its teeth again :D Our team leader is called Arif, and I think he really looks like Utt.. And our pretty vice team leader is Rou You! I kept pronouncing her name wrongly, argh, so sorry Rou You 姐姐。 Bernice, Hema and I kept exchanging stories about our schools, orientations and overseas exchange trips. And that's because we're the only JC students there.. Bernice is from NJ btw.. And I like her OGL tee, super pretty :D
Actually, to be honest. I couldn't concentrate much today, even while playing. My mind is always ticking, evaluating every single thing, screaming at me about things I can not put aside. Suddenly, a notion arises in my mind:
Why is Life so fragile? Why must we have to touch Death in order to appreciate what we have? Life is like the flapping of butterfly wings, silvery, yet vulnerable and beautiful at the same time. A light tap brings the butterfly falling to the ground, a rough smear destroys those butterfly wings, it falls, it falls; unseen tears litter the sky. Such a small thing but so beautiful, so small, so free. Just like Life. I don't know what to say. I shant say anymore, lest I start crying again.
It's The Mood again. Well, some people like to call it PMS, I just refer to it as a perpetual occurrence.. I snapped at some people just now. Eh, much apologies.
Drowning in thoughts again.. Feeling that I haven't done enough for myself, or for anyone.. Struggling to breathe when the whole world comes to drag you down.. Thank God my determination never fails me.. Time and time again, I pull myself out of the crevice. Only to dare the long road before me to mock me once again. Should I say this, my perspicacity is beyond any other. At least, I know where I'm headed to.
And I fully intend to proceed on. No matter how many tribulations, how many storms, how many turbulences...
Carry me on.
对了。为什么就感觉是预示到的事？ 是感到伤心，还是有一种背叛的感觉？ 不知道，不想知道。。 不想再想这件事了。 因为不在，就。。就不许要问我的同意吗？ 必想，不是你做出来的。。不是你费心而汗来做出的，谁都不会明白的。。 算了。咳。也不想再说了。 This is the ways of the world I suppose.
啊啊。。我又在blog了。。 因为时间过得太闷了。。。 哦，假期时就应该加倍努力的念书啊，蕴婧你是这么的懒惰啦。。 H2 Maths 的Poisson Distribution 快要把我逼疯了。。还有就是P&C 啦。。 认识的学长，最厉害就有Tommy了。。哈哈，Tommy 学长，请救我吧。。 吖，不知道你愿意教我吗。。告诉你，我学习的速度很慢。。 Erm, you can reply me in English, if you could read this, which I presume you can (: Well, I was just bored.. Seriously bored.. Need more shopping and more sleep.
EHHHH. I realised that my chinese typing skills suck balls.. HAHA. Wow, does that sound vulgar or what.
Well, I was ill today cause of lack of sleep.. maybe? But anyway, flying off again, soon. (:
I had fun playing iSketch with Vic and Canida and someone else yesterday! :D But I kept losing... Maybe it's because I'm slow? Hm.. But I'd get better! :DD
I'm so bored at home.. Someone entertain me please?
And yes, Tommy, I can't wait for O1 too (:
But at the same time, I'm really afraid of my studies.. It's A lvels next year.. And I should really study! ARGH. Why am I like blogging?
sometimes i can't touch reality, maybe it's because somehow i know that reality bites too much. and sometimes, it gets tiring, and then, i forget that i'm not alone. is it in my personality? -laughs. according to the horoscopes, Libra tends to behave in this way. Really? Then, I want to break past this label, this epitaph that claims to be a part of your life.
Hey, what are you doing? Where are you going? After this, what's next? Can I say, I don't know? It feels like I lost my grip on reality again.
I can't get through to Dad. I hope they're alright.
Maybe this loneliness is eating into me too much. So, bite it back (:
I'M HOME. :D LAST NIGHT. CAB WAS BLOODY EXPENSIVE. BECAUSE MY WHOLE FAMILY IS OVERSEAS. W/O ME!!! but i'm going to join them soon.
anyway, we returned from Xi'an last night at like 1 am? OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG i missed home so much .. But then again, Xi'an was really fun.. And on the flight, dark clouds set against a sky of the city of lights, pinnacles on the sea looked like a myraid of stars, it was so beautiful. Singapore is so beautiful. From the sky.
BY THE WAY, WHEN I CHECKED IN AT XI'AN INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT, MY LUGGAGE WAS A HEFTY29.1 KG!!!!!!!! That's like horrible!!!! I knew it was going to be over the weight limit but not so much! Thank God we checked in as a group, otherwise I would never have crossed the border.. Phew.. But I did a lot of shopping.. Practically every night, the Donkeys (Group D) would go out for shopping cause we were all girls.. And it was so cool ~ Uh, according to Siewps, I'm a SUPER BIG SPENDER.. BUT I'M NOT!!!!! My biggest purchase was at the Shu Cheng, um, a biggg book store.. I bought like 20 books worth 450 reminbi but they were cheap!!! So I couldn't resist. To us, everything in China is really really really cheap. Really. But still, it's not that cheap. And I'm not good at haggling.. So most of the time, I end up spending a lot of cash that could be a lot less.. Um, I spent all the money dad gave me, which is like almost 500 sing. And I know he's going to kill me, but uh, it happens every year. And it's really fun to just ignore the price tag and dump everything into your basket!! I so totally did that at Ayaya, which was really fun.. <3 size="4">SIEWPS and VIC, my rooommmate (thankyouforputtingupwithme:D) SINYING, my very noisy assistant leader (stopbeingsonoisyla:D) PRISCILLA/TIANYI, the professional photographer (shetakesgoodphotos:D) ZHIWEI, the very funny vice-pres of photog (iloveyou!!) PEI SIN, our dearest footballer who likes to paint my nails (iloveyoutoo!!) HUIYING.
And thro these people aren't from Donkey, but we mingled a lot :D And they are: Wanting (!!), Wuhan and Si Wen and of course, not forgetting everyone else who went on the trip, you are loved so very much ~
Actually, China is kinda fun and it's really cool. I enjoyed the school lessons about chinese culture and history.. And I don't regret going on this trip at all. Somehow, it does feel like I've found a bit of my roots in the homeland of my ancestors.
(If I had a choice on how my life will be, I want to travel with someone I love,
and take photographs of the myriad and the pretty, spreading the love of Christ,
near and far until the ends of the world!)
I ♥ God and God ♥ me!
Contrary to popular belief, I'm not unfriendly!!!!!!
Talk to me and I'd definitely talk to you.
Most people don't really get me but I usually get most people.
Economics is beyond fascinating. ;)
x
Family is ♥!
Best friends are ♥!
Colours are ♥!
The universe is ♥!
Benazir Bhutto got assasinated...!!!! I haven't read the papers for exactly four days. In four days, things sure happened. I feel sad. Musharraf is going to rule Pakistan forever. She was a beacon of hope for many.. Even though Pakistan isn't my country, I share in the grief that many feel. Was it a conspiracy by the military government? It's unlikely that it was ordered personally by Musharraf himself, I see him as a man, dictator nonetheless, but a man that keeps his promises. She was indeed a threat to him; so perhaps his colleagues had a part to play in the assasination. Pakistan has been thrown into a state of chaos. Justice must be carried out and quickly! Will the January parliamentary elections still be carried out? With Bhutto dead, it's almost meaningless now. But to honour her memory, it is hoped that Pakistan will continue with the election.
By the way, "Bhutto's aides said they doubted militant commander Baitullah Mehsud was behind the attack on the opposition leader and said the government's claim that she died when she hit her head on the sunroof of her vehicle was "dangerous nonsense." " NONSENSE INDEED.
Well. There's a test on monday for councillors and OGLs. Study hard everyone! Including me (:
HELLO! I'M BACK FROM OGL CAMP:D and still dead tired even through I had 9 hours of sleep earlier. I just closed my eyes, it was about 1 pm and when I awoke, the sky was already dark. It was quite a shock really.
OGL Camp was really fun, although I was pretty much out of it on this morning because of lack of sleep. Uh, I loved song-singing:DDD I really admire people who can still function despite not sleeping. Like Huilan. I mean, girl, how do you manage to study all night and sleep for an hour only to get up again to come to school for examinations? I've never been able to do it. I got Dad to take me home because I didn't think I had the strength to get up on a bus. Hm, usually I'm not this bummed after a 3 day camp but then again, usually we have more sleep. But hey, it was kinda fun trying to get up really early and running around because usually I don't wake up before 10 if I can help it.
I was really cranky though and I yelled at my brother for being not locking the door after me although he reallyy didn't deserve it. Mum was really nice despite commenting that I looked like a zombie. She made my favourite food for lunch and she even made Mum's Special Soup which is really complicated to do. Really touched. Thanks Mum. Right there and then, I really really really appreciated home-cooked food and my mum and my dad and my bed and my maid. I was so grateful until I almost cried. But before I could do that, I fell asleep on the bed, of course. LOVES.
Sometimes, I don't think horoscopes are just a kind of labelling. I feel that it's pretty damn true. I'm a Libra and they always say Libras can't make up their minds. True. I'm pretty fickle-minded. They also say that they're gullible. Crap, so true. And a lot more.
Oh, I wish I wish I stayed. Can no one understand. I can't turn the clock back. I can't bring back the past. So make do with the future.
I couldn't call through to UK today. I don't know why. I wanted to tell Aunty Taisee and Charlotte and the others Merry Christmas. But Uncle Ray got through to us, so I don't know why we couldn't call through. I wish I had more to say to Uncle Ray. Why do I feel like things changed.
My very very very nice kor (See? I said you're nice) keep trying to see his xiao mei more often but I always can't make it. ARGH. Sorry lah. Today's countdown, counting down elsewhere lols. New year's okay?
The usual day entry.
Ah! Today I received Aunty Liz's Christmas card from UK. Veh happy :D
Listen, I'm officially in love with Elijah Wood's superb acting. Yeah, I watched Lord of the Rings again. Can you imagine that he's not Frodo? It's impossible.
I told _____ that I didn't want ______, not even 10 meters near _______. What, am I on an excessive compulsive streak again? Not that I have ever been. Sigh. Ireadsomethingtodaythatmademyheadburstthoughitwasquiteawhileagoanditsanxstupid. Sometimes, I feel like drawing a huge Los Noches. Just to spite Mei. Not.
if only hearts were unbreakable.
Silent Night as sung in church.
Silent night, holy night All is calm, all is bright Round yon Virgin Mother and Child Holy Infant so tender and mild Sleep in heavenly peace Sleep in heavenly peace
Silent night, holy night! Shepherds quake at the sight Glories stream from heaven afar Heavenly hosts sing Alleluia! Christ, the Saviour is born Christ, the Saviour is born
Silent night, holy night Son of God, love's pure light Radiant beams from Thy holy face With the dawn of redeeming grace Jesus, Lord, at Thy birth Jesus, Lord, at Thy birth.
John 3:16
For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.
Seriously. My butt hurts, my shoulders ache and my head spins. Woo. And I'm sun burnt so badly, my arm all the way to the back of my hand is like bright red, not to mention my thighs and my legs and my feet. greaaattt~ Way to go, Cherie. Yay. Ouch. (I hit my elbow on the side of the table....) My sweet sister helped me apply aloe vera cream on it... Aw, so sweet. I'd get diabeties. Haha, just joking.. But it was really nice of her.
Besides, having a lot of havoc. There was also brainstorming. And answering tons of messages. How sweet. And reading some stuff. Top secret. Shh. And wondering if stoning just so I can have some kind of inspiration is actually going to help me study. I came to the conclusion that it isn't. Duh.
超级星光大道的林宥嘉ROCKS! He got above 20 stars for his performance again. Go, my Taiwanese Nino! :DDDDD
Time magazine rocks the sun. The List of Top 10 best quotes of the year just makes me laugh my eyes out. "Won't you just shut up?" anyone? Said by some King. Yours Truly, by royalty.
It's that feeling again. The feeling that someone was talking to me about just now. About looking at your best friend and wondering, "Who in the world is this person?" I even told another friend during our lengthy conversation that you're my almost ex-best friend. What happened? Am I going crazy? I would never have dreamed of saying that two years ago. But come on, I asked you if everything is alright, you said you'd talk to me soon. How soon is soon. How soon is soon. How soon is never. What's wrong? We tried didn't we. Sometimes, it's you who's making me feel like I've been abandoned. Just sometimes, it's the best friends who can make you feel like shit. And then, you realise, I've been the one hanging on.
Libra: Your desire to move on may be less than it once was. Lately, you have been made aware of the true cost of your plans, but at the heart of the matter you probably doubt whether you are truly worth it. Please put aside your lack of self-confidence once and for all.
Too bloody true.
Sometimes, I feel like I fight against nothing but fear.
okay, whatever.
MY EXTREMELY ANNOYING KID BROTHER CAME BEHIND ME JUST NOW AND BOO-ED ME WHEN I WAS THINKING ABOUT SOMETHING THAT IS DAMNHELL PERPLEXING AND I LOST MY TRAIN OF THOUGHT AND IN A MOMENT OF VIOLENCE, I THREW MY GOOD PEN AT HIM, WHAT THE HELL. STUPID KID, IT WASN'T SCARY BUT ANNOYING! I JUST WISH HE WOULD FUCKING GROW UP AND STOP BEING SUCH A BRAT AND READ THE SITUATION, DAMN IT. SOMETIMES LIKE NOW, I JUST WANT TO WRING HIS STUPID FAT WHITE NECK AND KILL HIM AND GET OVER WITH IT, JUST FOR THE SAKE OF NOT LIVING WITH THE PAIN OF HAVING TO COACH HIM ALL THE BLOODY TIME AND NOT GETTING ANY STUPID CREDIT AND STILL HAVING TO GIVE HIM OH, HE'S A KID TREATMENT WHEN I GET FURIOUS OVER HIM, SO I CAN'T TOUCH ONE SINGLE HAIR OF HIS BLOODY SHIN BECAUSE OLDER SISTERS ARE SUPPOSED TO PROTECT THEIR YOUNGER BROTHERS. EAT DIRT IN HELL CAUSE IM NOT DOING IT ANY LONGER. I'VE TOLERATED ENOUGH.
DAMN IT. AND IM NOT GOING BACK TO THINKING ABOUT THAT STUPID THING I WAS FRUSTRATED OVER. NOT IF PEOPLE ARE GOING TO INTERRUPT ME, NO FING WAY IN HELL.
This is me being extremely extremely angry beyond boiling point! Unpleasantness comes with siblings.
And to think that a while ago I was actually doing alright and now, he's turned that half smile into a full blown frown.
Cherie ( what makes sense : 朴素的世界。 says: you din reply my msg idiot. [c=4]Moni [/c] says: wat [c=4]Moni [/c] says: i slping lah Cherie ( what makes sense : 朴素的世界。 says: wah lau
You have just sent a nudge.
Cherie ( what makes sense : 朴素的世界。 says: dont tell me you're still slping LUH. [c=4]Moni [/c] says: wat [c=4]Moni [/c] says: not gd for me lor Cherie ( what makes sense : 朴素的世界。 says: whyyy? [c=4]Moni [/c] says: i c the assignments i sian diao [c=4]Moni [/c] says: -angry face- Cherie ( what makes sense : 朴素的世界。 says: your face is always angry Cherie ( what makes sense : 朴素的世界。 says: LOL Cherie ( what makes sense : 朴素的世界。 says: sadded -SECRET-
Cherie ( what makes sense : 朴素的世界。 says: look at nick/ Cherie ( what makes sense : 朴素的世界。 says: haha [c=4]Moni [/c] says: chung!!! [c=4]Moni [/c] says: NOT CHONG Cherie ( what makes sense : 朴素的世界。 says: OOPS. [c=4]Moni [/c] says: alamak [c=4]Moni [/c] says: 5 yrs fren le [c=4]Moni [/c] says: change [c=4]Moni [/c] says: WTH??!! Cherie ( what makes sense : 朴素的世界。 says: i keep forgetting Cherie ( what makes sense : 朴素的世界。 says: HAHAHAHAH [c=4]Moni [/c] says: eh [c=4]Moni [/c] says: y chong again [c=4]Moni [/c] says: omg [c=4]Moni [/c] says: chung [c=4]Moni [/c] says: chung [c=4]Moni [/c] says: CHUNG [c=4]Moni [/c] says: no slash [c=4]Moni [/c] says: no / [c=4]Moni [/c] says: LOL [c=4]Moni [/c] says: yes Cherie ( what makes sense : 朴素的世界。 says: LOL [c=4]Moni [/c] says: tats right [c=4]Moni [/c] says: c my nick [c=4]Moni [/c] says: wat?!! [c=4]Moni [/c] says: chuga? [c=4]Moni [/c] says: oO [c=4]Moni [/c] says: :2 Cherie ( ow : my time magazine has arrived (: says: HAHAHA Cherie ( ow : my time magazine has arrived (: says: READ Cherie ( ow : my time magazine has arrived (: says: lol [c=4]Moni [/c] says: OK [c=4]Moni [/c] says: c [c=4]Moni [/c] says: unqiue right? [c=4]Moni [/c] says: im not toking abt u Cherie ( ow : my time magazine has arrived (: says: SHARING LIAN??? Cherie ( ow : my time magazine has arrived (: says: WAD DOES TT MEAN? [c=4]Moni [/c] says: LOL [c=4]Moni [/c] says: cherie mah [c=4]Moni [/c] says: den change to sharing Cherie ( ow : my time magazine has arrived (: says: HAHA Cherie ( ow : my time magazine has arrived (: says: chuga chuga Cherie ( ow : my time magazine has arrived (: says: LOL
you can't beat best friends for life man. you just can't.
Liw, my dearest twin sister though fortune that you share the same first name as me, I want to tell you that you're never alone. Sometimes, you may look around and feel alone but I hope you remember that we're just one call away, you know? Even if I'm like in some important lecture, or overseas or running around, so long as my phone rings, with your names, I will stop everything and listen. That's how much all of you mean to me, no, I should say that it can never be weighed, the importance of you 6. Just like how, when I broke down in school without the company of everyone and I called HuiQing in tears, I know that if I called anyone else in 7seven, you too would have stopped everything for me and listened to me sob. Jiayou! Gambatte! Fight on! You can do it! I say! Don't give up! Waves 12 is going to be great! And soon after, you can properly study alright? :D I had a great time talking about the past and present today! We should do stuff like these more often lah! But most importantly, I want you to remember not to overwork yourself!!!! OR you'd get it from me. HAHA. Kidding ~~~~~~ Much love.
I went to grandma's place, as usual. Mark korkor is back from Australia. I'm always happy to see family members who live overseas and are back for a while (:
I mean, I havent seen Mark kor for about 2 years now. He didn't change much.. But his hair is really tame now! It used to be crazyyyyy man, like mohawks and blue dyes and who knows what. He took out a few piercings I think.. It's just the lip piercing now. And he speaks with an aussie twang now. The stuff he tells me about Aus, man, I've always hated the racism there. Yesyes, I learnt plenty of words of wisdom from my wild cousin who has grown up alot.
My dad got threatened when he was there just because he's Asian. That's like, WTF, #$*(^&#^*t*fSTFU. Racism is disgusting. Isn't he human just like the rest of you? Shant say much, but yeah, but we were pissed, thanks. And apparently, their customs went through my aunt's wallet while she was there, asking her why she didnt bring much Aussie dollars and about her credit cards and her job and GOD KNOWS WHAT ELSE. WTF MAN, THAT'S LIKE AN INVASION OF PERSONAL PRIVACY. Oh right, I forgot, she's chinese too.
I've met nice Australians, I'm not saying they aren't nice. It's just bad experiences, maybe.
I had fun at grandma's place. I love her curry and her chicken wings and her presence. I heard someone call me 大小姐 today.. It usually happens when I'm being slow or whiny or something. It came about because I'm the oldest paternal granddaughter.. But I grinned when I heard it. Cause it's just so funny. Somehow, instead of feeling important, I felt like I'm being reprimanded in an amusing way.
I'm ready to roll. I've collected the pieces of me that scattered, I found back my dreams, those that I lost sight of while struggling in the dark cloth of sorrow. No more looking back.
Isn't it weird how some people you put all your trust upon ends up disappointing you? Isn't it incredible how one finds themselves in a situation they never thought they'd end in; turning left and right and finding yourself alone. Accidentally clicking on somebody's blog link and realised that you've been hurt by edgeless words, even as hard as you try to keep your heart still. Calling up that someone and wondering if they'd still pick up the call. Wondering.. wondering. Not knowing who is going to call and say "Come on, we need to talk" or "I missed you, how have you been?" How wretched is reality. How different as Time flows. Wondering if that friend who still claims to be your friend would listen to you, would talk, would understand, would they even care? Not knowing who is left, isn't that just so bitter. Sometimes I reflect and I remember, endless promises of friendship and fellowship and what nots and understand, at last, that forever is nothing. 10 yrs from now, would you still remember me? You friend, you who shared and laughed and cried and smiled. Would you remember? Tell me, would you?
im damn bummed lah. just got back from breakaway camp. the coolest camp ever can.
here we go again.
想要说，但还是沉默。。。
oh yeah, i left the camp early cause of family obligations.. From my CG, there are Hema, Xue Ting, Xue Yi and Yu Xian. And my team's name is called Paladin 1! :D We're the blues. Hahaha. Made a lot of new friends.. Surprisingly, I could rem all of their names with just one mention, my superb memory shows its teeth again :D Our team leader is called Arif, and I think he really looks like Utt.. And our pretty vice team leader is Rou You! I kept pronouncing her name wrongly, argh, so sorry Rou You 姐姐。 Bernice, Hema and I kept exchanging stories about our schools, orientations and overseas exchange trips. And that's because we're the only JC students there.. Bernice is from NJ btw.. And I like her OGL tee, super pretty :D
Actually, to be honest. I couldn't concentrate much today, even while playing. My mind is always ticking, evaluating every single thing, screaming at me about things I can not put aside. Suddenly, a notion arises in my mind:
Why is Life so fragile? Why must we have to touch Death in order to appreciate what we have? Life is like the flapping of butterfly wings, silvery, yet vulnerable and beautiful at the same time. A light tap brings the butterfly falling to the ground, a rough smear destroys those butterfly wings, it falls, it falls; unseen tears litter the sky. Such a small thing but so beautiful, so small, so free. Just like Life. I don't know what to say. I shant say anymore, lest I start crying again.
It's The Mood again. Well, some people like to call it PMS, I just refer to it as a perpetual occurrence.. I snapped at some people just now. Eh, much apologies.
Drowning in thoughts again.. Feeling that I haven't done enough for myself, or for anyone.. Struggling to breathe when the whole world comes to drag you down.. Thank God my determination never fails me.. Time and time again, I pull myself out of the crevice. Only to dare the long road before me to mock me once again. Should I say this, my perspicacity is beyond any other. At least, I know where I'm headed to.
And I fully intend to proceed on. No matter how many tribulations, how many storms, how many turbulences...
Carry me on.
对了。为什么就感觉是预示到的事？ 是感到伤心，还是有一种背叛的感觉？ 不知道，不想知道。。 不想再想这件事了。 因为不在，就。。就不许要问我的同意吗？ 必想，不是你做出来的。。不是你费心而汗来做出的，谁都不会明白的。。 算了。咳。也不想再说了。 This is the ways of the world I suppose.
啊啊。。我又在blog了。。 因为时间过得太闷了。。。 哦，假期时就应该加倍努力的念书啊，蕴婧你是这么的懒惰啦。。 H2 Maths 的Poisson Distribution 快要把我逼疯了。。还有就是P&C 啦。。 认识的学长，最厉害就有Tommy了。。哈哈，Tommy 学长，请救我吧。。 吖，不知道你愿意教我吗。。告诉你，我学习的速度很慢。。 Erm, you can reply me in English, if you could read this, which I presume you can (: Well, I was just bored.. Seriously bored.. Need more shopping and more sleep.
EHHHH. I realised that my chinese typing skills suck balls.. HAHA. Wow, does that sound vulgar or what.
Well, I was ill today cause of lack of sleep.. maybe? But anyway, flying off again, soon. (:
I had fun playing iSketch with Vic and Canida and someone else yesterday! :D But I kept losing... Maybe it's because I'm slow? Hm.. But I'd get better! :DD
I'm so bored at home.. Someone entertain me please?
And yes, Tommy, I can't wait for O1 too (:
But at the same time, I'm really afraid of my studies.. It's A lvels next year.. And I should really study! ARGH. Why am I like blogging?
sometimes i can't touch reality, maybe it's because somehow i know that reality bites too much. and sometimes, it gets tiring, and then, i forget that i'm not alone. is it in my personality? -laughs. according to the horoscopes, Libra tends to behave in this way. Really? Then, I want to break past this label, this epitaph that claims to be a part of your life.
Hey, what are you doing? Where are you going? After this, what's next? Can I say, I don't know? It feels like I lost my grip on reality again.
I can't get through to Dad. I hope they're alright.
Maybe this loneliness is eating into me too much. So, bite it back (:
I'M HOME. :D LAST NIGHT. CAB WAS BLOODY EXPENSIVE. BECAUSE MY WHOLE FAMILY IS OVERSEAS. W/O ME!!! but i'm going to join them soon.
anyway, we returned from Xi'an last night at like 1 am? OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG i missed home so much .. But then again, Xi'an was really fun.. And on the flight, dark clouds set against a sky of the city of lights, pinnacles on the sea looked like a myraid of stars, it was so beautiful. Singapore is so beautiful. From the sky.
BY THE WAY, WHEN I CHECKED IN AT XI'AN INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT, MY LUGGAGE WAS A HEFTY29.1 KG!!!!!!!! That's like horrible!!!! I knew it was going to be over the weight limit but not so much! Thank God we checked in as a group, otherwise I would never have crossed the border.. Phew.. But I did a lot of shopping.. Practically every night, the Donkeys (Group D) would go out for shopping cause we were all girls.. And it was so cool ~ Uh, according to Siewps, I'm a SUPER BIG SPENDER.. BUT I'M NOT!!!!! My biggest purchase was at the Shu Cheng, um, a biggg book store.. I bought like 20 books worth 450 reminbi but they were cheap!!! So I couldn't resist. To us, everything in China is really really really cheap. Really. But still, it's not that cheap. And I'm not good at haggling.. So most of the time, I end up spending a lot of cash that could be a lot less.. Um, I spent all the money dad gave me, which is like almost 500 sing. And I know he's going to kill me, but uh, it happens every year. And it's really fun to just ignore the price tag and dump everything into your basket!! I so totally did that at Ayaya, which was really fun.. <3 size="4">SIEWPS and VIC, my rooommmate (thankyouforputtingupwithme:D) SINYING, my very noisy assistant leader (stopbeingsonoisyla:D) PRISCILLA/TIANYI, the professional photographer (shetakesgoodphotos:D) ZHIWEI, the very funny vice-pres of photog (iloveyou!!) PEI SIN, our dearest footballer who likes to paint my nails (iloveyoutoo!!) HUIYING.
And thro these people aren't from Donkey, but we mingled a lot :D And they are: Wanting (!!), Wuhan and Si Wen and of course, not forgetting everyone else who went on the trip, you are loved so very much ~
Actually, China is kinda fun and it's really cool. I enjoyed the school lessons about chinese culture and history.. And I don't regret going on this trip at all. Somehow, it does feel like I've found a bit of my roots in the homeland of my ancestors.
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